Okay, I’m not trying to be morbid here, but this title has very real significance for me. While in recovery after my routine laparoscopic hysterectomy a few weeks ago, I stopped breathing—for 3-5 minutes. My poor hubby was alone in the room when it happened. He called for the nurse, and within seconds fifteen medical professionals were attaching all sorts of bells and whistles to his wife. I don’t remember any of it, of course, but when I woke up I remember thinking, Darn. I didn’t even get a glimpse of Jesus!
My point is…we were surprised when death knocked at our door.
I’ve been kind of amazed at how peaceful I’ve felt about the whole ordeal. I’m thankful for that, trusting that I’m fully settled into the arms of my Savior whenever death comes. But as I read 2 Kings 15 the other day in my quiet time, wicked old King Menahem gave me pause…
A King’s Legacy
Nasty ol’ King Menahem was one of the bad kings in northern Israel a couple hundred years after David’s united kingdom split. The northern kingdom of Israel had a pretty awful track record of idol worship, and King Menahem was one of the best at being worst.
“Menahem…became king of Israel, and he reigned in Samaria ten years. He did evil in the eyes of the Lord. During his entire reign he did not turn away from the sins of Jeroboam…which he had caused Israel to commit…Menahem rested with his ancestors. And Pekahiah his son succeeded him as king.” 2 Kings 15:17-18, 22
My question to King Menahem is this:
“If you knew you only had ten years to reign as King of Israel, would you have done it differently?”
Numbering Our Days
We all know our days are numbered, right? But do we really think about that? If King Menahem knew in his ninth year that the next year would be his last, would he have been a different kind of king?
Let’s turn that question around and think about when my breath was gone, and my life nearly lost. What if they hadn’t been able to resuscitate me?
If I had known MY life would end on September 28, 2015, would I have lived differently in the days, weeks, and months leading up to it? Perhaps the more important question is:
Will I live differently now?
The Little-Big Things
I’m in the midst of soul-searching. I’m not guilty of the major sins, you know—murder, stealing, or anything else you get arrested for. But it’s those “little-big” things (as my husband calls them) that bleed into the cracks of my life and make the cracks bigger and bigger until they break me into pieces. Those little-big things like envy, pride, idolatry, and other sneaky sins with shameful names that hide in seemingly harmless acts.
You want an example? How about being too busy to heal from this surgery properly? At the root of that are the sins of pride and idolatry—I’m too proud to ask for help, and I’ve elevated my work above God’s desire for me to rest my body. See? Sneaky sins. Little-big things.
How Then Shall We Live?
Like I said, I’m in the midst of some soul-searching. I’m not sure what those changes will entail, but I know it involves balance. Part of my soul-searching involves asking my Lord Jesus where my life is currently out of balance. Here are five categories that I’ve jotted down with the areas of each category that need my attention. It was helpful to see it in writing to determine which areas I’m weak in:
- God – solitude/silence, praise, personal discipleship, Sabbath
- Family – relationships, time, serving
- Church – worship, discipleship, serving, relationships
- Work – writing, marketing, learning
- Free time – relationships, alone time, exercise, hobbies
My free time definitely needs work. I vaguely recall having some back in the early 1980’s.
When I Die…
I know I’m saved, and I don’t have to work for my salvation because Jesus paid for my sins on the Cross by becoming a perfect sacrifice for all sin. I know I’ll see Him in heaven because I believe that.
But on the day I die—whenever that is—I hope to have lived a life that causes Jesus to smile. I pray that He wraps me in His arms and says:
“Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!” Matthew 25:21
THAT’S why I want to live well today…and every day for the rest of my life.
Tweet-A-Licious!
- Get rid of little-big things: sneaky sins with shameful names that hide in seemingly harmless acts.
- Soul-searching involves asking Jesus where my life is out of balance in 5 important categories.
- I know I’m saved and I don’t have to work for salvation because Jesus paid for my sins on the Cross.
Today’s Question:
- Of the five categories I mentioned above, in which do you find healthy balance hardest to reach?
Comments 12
Wow, Mesu, that is so powerful! When my sister committed suicide I told myself I would not take life for granted and yet here I am 25 years later and still haven’t learned that lesson. Thanks for the reminder and insight. You inspire me more than you know.
Author
I’m so sorry to hear about your sister, Michele. I pray the Lord will continue to work gently in your heart and life as He is in mine, friend.
Ouch, stepping on my toes. I know I’ve been slipping in my quiet time and just spending time with God. I think my radio not getting my Christian station on Sundays is His way of saying focus on me. I forget to say thank you so many times. I also have some of those little-big sins to take care of too. Thanks for the reminder to take time to be with the Father.
Author
We all need those reminders, Connie. Blessings as you make those adjustments He’s revealed to you.
Thanks for writing this today. I am not sure I have balance in any area of my life right now. My mother is fighting cancer and I’m the main caretaker, running her here and there, helping with little things. I have a new job at work, new stressors there, trying to figure out what I am doing, new boss, lots to learn. And my husband is in such chaos w/his job – was let go after 18 years with no explanation, has another, but less money, further to drive. He is a mess and one of the ways he gets through is just working harder and more, so he takes on a part time job as well. He is gone all the time, things at the house are not getting done, because he isn’t here and because I am mentally, physically, and emotional exhausted. Today is our 28th anniversary and we both took the day off. Nothing really planned, which is great, but there is so much to do and I am having a hard time relaxing. To say I/we are a mess is probably an understatement. But God is good and he sends little reminders (like your post above). This too shall pass, I am trusting Him! And I long to hear the same thing when my time comes to pass from this world – well done, good and faithful servant. Have a blessed day!
Author
Oh, Kathy…it will pass…but in the midst of it, it’s just plain hard. I’m so sorry. There are seasons of life when balance is simply a memory and a dream, but simply putting one foot in front of the other brings glory to God. Try to keep your focus on the One who loves you most.
Powerful…I really needed to read this this morning. Going through some rough times with my husband, Jimmy, thinking we have company every morning when he wakes and it takes me to have patients with him to explain that he must have been dreaming. Alzheimer’s is a really bad disease to have and it really hurts to see him go through this. But I know with God in our lives, we will get through these times. God is awesome. Thanks for letting me vent. Love to all.
Author
I remember those last few years that my mom took care of my dad in the home. They were the hardest of both their lives. I think both of them leaned harder on God’s grace during those days than I’ve ever seen them lean. Alzheimer’s is ugly, but your loving care is beautiful. Hugs and prayers to you, dear one.
Oh yes. And I have found some precious time comes when I am standing, close my eyes, thinking how lovely Jesus is……not DOING anything – just breathing in His loveliness, His love…just immersed in His love, delving INTO HIM. I like that. That is refreshing me – and I think He likes that too. Being loved…adored… I like to hide in His heart…and in there I am the real me.
Author
That is the best place to be…hiding IN Him…a glimpse of heaven.
I had a reminder that my days are numbered after my surgery to remove a rare tumor. I, too, am doing soul-searching but kinda put on hold since my husband is having upcoming surgery to remove a mass on his kidney. Life is fragile and I’m ready to ‘retire’ and move closer to family. Praying and asking if God has put this on my heart or if I did! Great post and really hit home with me. Thanks Mesu!
Author
Big events often spark big decisions. Praying the Lord gives you clear guidance, friend.