As my 11-year-old son walked out of the house at the end of January in shorts, I commented that he could wear what he wanted but my suggestion that he wear pants would help him avoid his feelings getting hurt by comments from others. His response left me speechless, ashamed and heartbroken. “Mom, the only person who ever says anything mean about my clothes, is you.” He said it with such tenderness that I knew he was trying to reassure me that no one would make fun of him, so he wasn’t worried. What I realized was that in my effort to shield his feelings, I had hurt him more than anyone else could.
Eugene Peterson’s Message version of Romans 7:21-25 describes my behavior perfectly:
“It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decided to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but its’ pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge. I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question? The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.” Romans 7:21-25
As we drove home later that afternoon, I lovingly apologized to my son for my earlier comment. I explained that I want to be the person in his life that he always feels accepted by no matter what he wears. I asked for his forgiveness; he graciously provided immediate forgiveness.
1 John 1:9 reminds me that God offers me forgiveness as well.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1John 1:9
It was important for my relationship with my son for me to confess and apologize when my words hurt him. It is crucial for my relationship with God to confess my sins and ask for his forgiveness. Only then, can I continue to mature as a Christ follower.
Gracious Father – I thank you for the ultimate sacrifice of your son, Jesus, so that all I must do is confess my sins and ask for your forgiveness which you supply in abundance.
